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Wife Selling
Some of you will remember the opening chapter of Thomas Hardy’s ‘Mayor of Casterbridge: “Will anybody buy her?” said the man. “I wish somebody would,” said she firmly. “Her present owner is not at all to her liking!” “Nor you to mine,” said he. “So we are agreed about that. Gentlemen, you hear? It's an agreement to part. She shall take the girl if she wants to, and go her ways. I'll take my tools, and go my ways. 'Tis simple as Scripture history. Now then, stand up, Susan, and show yourself.” . . . . . “I'll sell her for five guineas to any man that will pay me the money, and treat her well; and he shall have her for ever, and never hear aught o' me. But she shan't go for less. Now then—five guineas—and she's yours. Susan, you agree?” She bowed her head with absolute indifference. “Five guineas,” said the auctioneer, “or she'll be withdrawn. Do anybody give it? The last time. Yes or no?” “Yes,” said a loud voice from the doorway.
Between the 17th and 19th centuries, wife selling had emerged as a folk custom in England, particularly among working-class communities. It was not legally sanctioned, but it became a socially recognized, if controversial, method of ending a marriage when formal divorce was inaccessible or unaffordable. It was never lawful, but magistrates sometimes turned a blind eye, especially if all parties seemed satisfied. In many recorded cases the original couple had already split up and the wife had been living with the new partner for some time.
Although the 1858 Matrimonial Causes Act had created a civil divorce court which made divorce technically possible it was stiill very expensive and socially unacceptable. It was not until this Act was reformed in 1923, that divorce was put on an equal footing between men and women.
No-one has ever documented the custom of husband selling in England. The practice reflected the gendered power imbalance of the time. Men held legal and economic authority, so there was no perceived need—or social mechanism—for women to sell their husbands.
If you've read this far you might be asking, what has any of this to do with Stoke St Gregory? In 1839 the local paper reported this little episode:
"STOKE ST. GREGORY. (From our Correspondent.) Selling a Wife.—A few days ago an extraordinary scene occurred at this village, for the accuracy of which we can vouch. A man deliberately bargained for the sale his wife, aged only about 23, to a youth just out of his apprenticeship, and who was just 21 year's old. The stipulated price was a gander, worth about 4s (20p). It appears to be a firm article of creed among our peasantry that such a sale is legal, provided it be attended with certain forms. Accordingly, in observance of the form, the purchaser went three miles to North Curry to buy a halter (it must a new one, they say). This was duly fastened about the waist of the wife, who was led by the husband, nothing loath, to the Inn at which the buyer lived, & formally delivered to him with a warranty!! the terms of which we cannot print, though curious for their minuteness. This done, and the wife transferred, the parties drank together, and dined together, and were jolly together for some hours But when the time for parting came, the husband repented him of his bargain. He offered to pay the costs of the evening, restore the gander, and add a bonus to boot, if the buyer would only abandon his purchase. The wife, however, was averse either to go again to her old home, or leave her new one. After considerable dispute the husband was allowed to have his wife again for that night. They compromised their differences next day, and the affair ended by the husband giving a sovereign to the buyer to resign his purchase. We understand that one of the parties holds an office in the parish."